Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Learning to Live

I don't think I've ever been in a place like this before. My memories of moving from one place to another are: decide to move, sell (if not renting), move. Nothing like what we're going through now.

Husband is slowly packing up the house. Still have the kitchen and our bedroom, the garage and laundry room to pack. I help some but mostly feel totally useless. He's a much better packer than I am and wants to do it himself. With my bum knee it's not a good idea for me to climb ladders or carry boxes (even if I could lift them!)

Our house will be sold one way or another. That part is for sure. The other house is asking for an extension for their bankruptcy court date before they close--IF the judge releases the house. Since we aren't buying it and our son is, it's up to him. If they aren't able buy the house, that puts us in the situation of having no place to live.

BUT! God is certainly bigger than all this and we still trust Him.

It is just so strange to be living in limbo. I wonder how many people have lived that way and live that way every day? To me limbo means living in minimal basic order. The way I see it, there should be an order to life. Not for us. We can't make plans beyond today.

Wait! Isn't that what we're supposed to do? Live every day as though it is the last? This is the day the Lord has made, rejoice and be glad in it? Does that mean we just live day by day without making plans?

I've always been a long-range planner. Can't do that now. Long-range to us is knowing we will get up tomorrow and prepare to move somewhere, some day---probably, but things could change at any time. Is that enough? Feels wrong to me even though I can't do anything else at this time except keep writing my little stories for the grands for Christmas. (Most likely Christmas will come and chances are we'll still be alive by then, and living somewhere.)

One really good thing about where we are now is that we don't have to worry about housecleaning. We're letting the dust settle on the furniture, allowing the floors to remain unvacuumed and mopped, (but we do make the bed every day.) No one's coming to visit and if they do, they'll understand the mess. What I'm missing is order. I do like order and I'm way out of my comfort zone.

When all is said and done, we'll look back on this and see what was really happening. If God isn't working all this out for our good, then what is going on? Like Paul, I think we're learning to be content in whatever state we are in. Even in chaos!

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