I just read the comments to my last blog and am blown away by crazeemommy. She put my own thoughts down for me to read. Yes, God is at work in my life. Yes, He miraculously delivered me from smoking in one moment and I've never wanted another cigarette since. Yes, I've seen how He's healed people--miracle healings. I've heard His voice in my innermost being as well as when I've read the Bible or heard someone say something that struck me to the core. And, like her, I don't understand when those things don't happen all the time.
We have the most wonderful friend who is battling cancer right now. If it was a question about who sinned, she'd be scot-free because she's sweet, thoughtful, spiritual, eats right, loves people, has raised a great family and been a strength to many people. She hasn't done anything except honor God with her life all her
70+ years. Yet here she is fighting disease.
I have some health issues because of choices I made in the past. If God passed out favors and sticks and stones because of what I've done in my life, I'd have a barrel of sticks and stones. Instead I have favors. I don't deserve any of it, but I'm so grateful for my life and so glad he doesn't award us based on our actions.
This morning in church I got an idea for a book about hearing God's voice. I'm not sure whether it will ever be written, but I'm hoping God will give me His words to put on paper so someone, or many someones, will know that He still talks to us. After reading the comments to the last blog, I think this book needs to cover more. I hope I can write it even though I don't have the answers right now. Maybe, if this is a work He is leading me to enter, then He'll give me some. Until then, I'm like crazeemommy and don't understand.